Hi. Welcome back to DeMeStified.  Thanx for the very warm reception you gave the Terminal 8 series. Glad to have gotten that bout of silly out of the way. I had thought it’d be another while before the silly feelings returned. #Bleh…. Anyways, we’ll just have to see what becomes of the lingering cravings now. If this year’s busy outlook is anything to go by, they’ll come in handy at some point.

The past few months have been pretty eventful, personally, nationally – even globally. The twists and turns just keep popping up, leaving the distance between events no more than a few steps. You’ll marvel at the sheer number of alarming stuff that’s happened between the last post and now.

ArsenalFC finally broke the jinx and won their first piece of silverware in 9 years. The #BringBackOurGirls hashtag has understandably become more popular and relevant than the Nigerian national anthem. No concrete action, however, 41+ days down. Pretty dire situation, worsened by deeply entrenched incompetence in leadership. On top of that, one woman has singlehandedly slashed how the world perceives the mental adequacy of 170 million people. And, some jungle-crawling cud-chewing maniacal bigot has now become a YouTube sensation. All because a few people cannot draw the line and think for themselves.

Lots of fairly serious stuff to talk about – like reminding ourselves not to let up in our demands for good governance and the safe return of our girls. Hopefully, we can touch on that sometime soon. Today, though, I want to pay my debt to Michael. I’ve let it linger too long.

While going through his blog sometime back, I made the delightful ‘mistake’ of commenting on a post called ‘All the weird things I do’. He, then, made me promise to make [and publish] a list of my own! Observing one’s self can be a little tedious, really.

If you’ve seen Michael’s list, you’d know there’s no contest here. He’s got some amazing things on there; almost makes me feel like just another guy. I don’t presume the list below to be in any way exhaustive; truth is, just about anything can seem weird, depending on where one views from. A promise is what it is, though – so I’ll just go ahead and share.

“Our greatest similarity is that we’re all different. How tragic that we yet chase what we already have!” – Imisi

1.    Age is Just a Number
I remember my last and next age milestones – never the actual one. I usually have to compute when asked. Thankfully, not many people [act like they] detect the stutter.

2.    Uncouth Fibres
People often ask what language others think in. They say it might affect the speed of reasoning. Well, this isn’t about that. This concerns my choice of language when speaking to myself. It’s a time when every Nollywood motor-park scene suddenly comes alive – and I find myself borrowing a few terms.

3.    FoodStuck
I’m stuck on certain foods. Biggest instance: I’m hardly able to eat anything else after soccer until I’ve had a large bowl of garri. Started in 2002. The habit took a mini break last year, but seems to be coming back now.

4.    GuessWorth
I’m always guessing at stuff. My favourites are time and weight. Success rate has been an absolute disgrace – but, I keep at it.

5.    Distractions are Welcome
Sometimes, I feel the best way around a problem is a distraction. And, I keep a few close. Sleep ranks highly on that list :D. A few days ago, I had trouble remembering the word ‘gegemu’ [please don’t ask what for]. No one around seemed able to help – so, … Anyways, it was right there in the mail when I woke.

6.    Stare Down
Every now and then, I find myself staring and roaring at the mirror. It’s actually a pretty soothing experience. Can’t say there’s some logic to it. Therefore, for lack of a decent explanation, I think of it as a reminder of the lion’s elegance. Not sure real lions stare at anything long before pouncing, though!

7.    Sticky Steps
When I see a new dance step, it sticks somewhere in my head. Give it a while and I’ll find myself trying [or actually doing] it – often to no music.

8.    Leftist Movement
Whenever there’s something to carry, the heavier stuff goes in my left hand. If that’s not leftism, tell me what is!

9.    Sheepish Sleep
I smile in my sleep.  Not that I know this for fact – but a few people have said it. Twist, though, is they think ‘oh, you must be a very happy person’. No attempt to dispute that claim. I’ll just say the smile is more like “I’m having a chill time – and all you can do is stare. Idiot!”.

10.    Intense E.T.
I try to keep stuff intense. I don’t really enjoy so much space between tasks. Typically, if I once had to work 4 hours to reach the 80% mark, I’d try working 3 hours to reach 85% next time. The shameful part is that I’d typically spend the extra hour upfront on other stuff.

11.    Black is Beautiful
Sometimes, just to see how much stuff I can knock over before finding my way, I either close my eyes or turn off all room lights. Eventually, one begins to commit stuff to memory – every arrangement, every personal touch, every cobweb!

12.    Risky is Key
I do stupid stuff pretty often. Some may pass for ‘risky’ – others, I admit, are just plain stupid. I do them all, regardless. E.g. I really hate to call ahead when going to meet family [and friends that qualify as family]. Been left red-faced a few times – but I never learn! I’m still living through the biggest risk I ever took. Maybe I’d have more to say when it’s done.

13.    Artial Marts
I ‘practice’ a form of martial arts no other living being can attest to. It’s a mix of air-boxing, rookie-aikido and what I recall of Tekken. I do it so seriously one would think I knew what I was about. Juice Lee has probably rolled many times in his grave by now. Too bad he can’t do a lot about it!

14.    Psuedo-Coup
Whenever I see three stones along my path, it’s an opportunity to practice soccer. It’s usually no more than simple passing and shooting; yet, it feels like a puzzle to the folks around. Most times, I don’t notice till midway through.

15.    Snailery
I try to read many books at once. Helps distract me from the amount of time it takes to finish one. Sometimes, I can almost feel a book growing bigger simply because I touched it.

16.    WordPhobia
I have an illogical aversion for certain words [words only – not the actual idea]. The very short list includes stuff like ‘romantic’, ‘weird’, ‘dating’ and ‘courtship’. PS – Can’t be sure any inference you draw here is valid oh. 😉

Well, there goes my list! Some habits, I live with; others live with me. Congrats to all Madrid fans on bagging #LaDecima! Next post won’t take so long. I’ll be glad to hear your peculiarities too 😀